The Wants of Our Hearts

Why is it hard to trust in God with the wants of our hearts?
For sometimes we want things that aren’t even good for us. We want things that may be second best to what God had planned for us. How can we trust in the Lord and wait on Him, if we don’t really trust Him but trust in ourselves more?

“Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.”
Matthew 16:24

Now I know I started this off pretty blunt, but there really isn’t another way to write this blog without writing what my heart feels. For I believe that our God is good and He loves us. He loves us so much that He created great plans for us, but for those plans to come to pass, we must seek Him with all of our hearts, for to know His plans we must know His heart. (Jeremiah 29:11-13) Jesus came and died so that doors could be opened for us to know the Father intimately, but we must walk through those doors and choose Him. He is our Father and longs to see His children succeed in His truth and ways. He sings over us and rejoices over us as we seek to please Him and know Him. I believe He isn’t merely looking for those who do acts mindlessly but rather love Him with all of their heart and soul. When it comes to our dreams and wants, why do we feel as though we won’t get it? Why do we fear God is a mean good who gives us things just to take them away for fun?

Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him, and he will act.
Psalm 37:5

I have come to points in my life where I’ve asked myself,

Why do I feel as though I wouldn’t get what I dreamed of?
Why do I feel as though God would withhold such beauty from me and give me something I did not want?
Why do I find it so hard to trust God with my hearts desires?

And slowly after asking myself all these whys, a small voice spoke,

Why do you believe lies instead of the truth?

I stood speechless. How have I allowed my heart to believe in lies rather than the Word of God. How have I allowed myself to get so caught up in what I wanted that I missed seeking for the Lords heart and guidance upon these decisions.

This past little while after various people have messaged me heartbroken, thinking they were going to have to settle without what their hearts desperately wanted. I have come to see that we fear not getting what we’ve always wanted, because we hold onto them to tightly. We fear placing our desires down at the feet of Jesus because we feel He won’t pick them back up. We fear allowing all that we’ve longed for and worked towards be put on the alter in-case it won’t happen. We’ve lost our trust in the Lord because we fear He isn’t who He said He is, a merciful and loving Father.137430226098457039_eqym0gz7_c_thumb

I have also come to see that we cling tighter onto our own desires when we do not know the Fathers heart. When we lack spending intimate time with the Lord, we feel as though our dreams, our passions are the only things that we can attain. The more time we spend away from God, the more we will be attached to our own wants and needs. The more time I spend in Gods presence, there is no question that I would be willing to let go of anything if He asks of me, but to be honest, the more time I spend away from Him and doing work or allowing the busyness of life to creep up on me, the more I want things that I can achieve myself rather than doing the things only He can do.

““For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
    neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
 “As the heavens are higher than the earth,
    so are my ways higher than your ways
    and my thoughts than your thoughts.”
Isaiah 55:8-9

Now I am not saying wanting things are bad, but when those things bring you to a place of choosing them over what God may have planned for you, then we have a problem. For we are seeking selfish gain rather than a life of obedience and surrender to the Lord. Ask yourself why you hold onto that dream so tightly and why you won’t allow the Lord to work His plan in His timing through you. For God’s plan for our life is for His goodness and salvation to be seen and experienced; but when we are so caught up in what we want and how we can succeed in it, then we miss the people who we could be loving and allowing Jesus to impact because we are caught up, in well, ourselves.

For God knows our hearts, He knows what we desire and He knows the great things we can do with our lives through our passions.

Why do you think that God won’t give us the very things He created us for?
Whether we want a family, a loving spouse or a great job, we must accept one thing.

That Our God is a good God. He is loving and He longs to see us doing exactly what He has created us but not doing it out of vain or compromising who we are in Him, but to glorifying Him through all things.

For once we lay down our hearts desires and choose Jesus. Once they are picked back up, they are picked up with a new mindset, a new outlook and a new vision. They are no longer for our own selfish gain but us seeing how we can love Jesus and others the most through what we do. It’s now “How can we bring the Kingdom through our every move?” instead of “How much money can I get?”

“Whom have I in heaven but you?
    And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
 My flesh and my heart may fail,
    but God is the strength of my heart
    and my portion forever.”
Psalm 73:25-26

Following Jesus is simply turning our focus from only those things and onto Him. For now we are not pursuing dead end roads that will store us up treasures just here on earth but we are working for an eternal Kingdom which is storing us up treasures in heaven while we are able to enjoy our life here; bringing beauty into the lives of others.

For here and now, He will prepare us and transform us into vessels that will carry forth His presence into all that we desire to do with our lives. He has given us free will, to choose Him and through choosing Him, bring Him into every aspect of our lives. And maybe that will mean changing somethings, things that don’t edify or glorify Him, however the things we let go of, are nothing in comparison to the beautiful glory we will receive with Jesus. For now we are not seeking in vain or walking empty-handed but joyfully walking with Him as He prepares the way for us.

I guess it’s walking by faith. For now we are walking in His timing rather than our own, waiting for Him to open the right doors, than us opening every door that appears in-front of us. Although we may want everything exactly when we want it, we must choose to trust in our Lords timing and His plans. For His plans are for us to succeed and prosper. For Jesus wants to be the greatest thing in our hearts. He wants us to lay down all our desires and fix our eyes on Him for when we do so and seek Him-He will work all things out. And when laying it down, we will no longer be carrying burdens and heaven loads, which bring forth anxiety and worry-but now we will be walking with our Savior and allowing Him to do that which we cannot do, while enjoying the beauty of a life doing the things we love.

Father God, may you humble our hearts and allow us to become less and you oh Lord become greater. For I acknowledge that apart from you, I have nothing good, but in you I have the fullness of life. Help me Holy Spirit to lay down my desires and my wants and to allow you to move through me only that which you can. May my life be for your glory and not my own. May my eyes be taken off myself and be fixed onto Jesus the author and perfecter of my faith. Forgive me for laboring in vain and seeking my own fleshly desires rather than what you may have planned for you. I ask that you oh Lord lead me into all truth and purify my heart, revealing anything that I have been holding above my relationship with you. May I love you above myself and my own desires, may you be glorified through my life. I acknowledge that your ways are greater than mine and your plans for me are good and I will succeed as I abide in you. I choose you. Thank you Lord for your redemption and life, thank you that I do not walk alone but walk with you and am walking towards an eternal life with you. I love you, in Jesus name, amen! 

May you ask to truth in the Lord more than you trust in yourself. Take time to read the Word of God and meditate on His truths. May we not seek God to try to butter Him up to do what we want Him to do for us, because He does not owe us anything. We need Him desperately and may we live for Him whole-heartily.

“I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” Galatians 2:20

“And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again.”
2 Corinthians 5:15

Love is not expecting someone to do something for you, it is working together with them to bring forth the greater plan.

(I know this is kind of long already, but quick testimony!)

I once thought that I needed to let go of everything for Jesus. That I wasn’t going to get what I wanted and I came to be okay with that because I realized He is greater than anything I could attain on earth, and truthfully if He wasn’t in it, I didn’t want to be. For without Him it is for worldly gain, which will leave me empty and never satisfied but always seeking more. Once I learned to lay myself down at His feet (which I continually have to do!) I began to not hold anything close to me except for Him and once I acknowledged, not just with my mind but my heart, that He truly is all I desire and whatever He wants, I am willing. He then brought my desires back up, for I believe, once we are truly surrendered, then we won’t hold that which we desire above Him but will allow Him to now work through those passions for His glory. For once we submit all things to Him, then He is able to work through us in them, because we not longer want those things, but want Him.

After a year of learning to surrender to the Lord all of my life and dreams, He has now brought me to a place where all my desires have come to pass. I live on a ranch, riding horses, being able to share His love with others and enjoy His beautiful creation everyday. I couldn’t be more thankful for His surpassing greatness and goodness, because I myself could have never worked out all this on my own, but through Him and His grace, He has created beauty.

I am grateful I am continuing to learn to trust in Him and lean not on my own understanding but acknowledging Him in all my ways. For in Him is eternal life and without Him is selfish gain. But we must learn to choose Him and not ourselves. To go against what our flesh tells us and live as the Word of God tells us,

So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.
Galatians 5:16

I pray for you that the eyes of your heart are enlightened to see Him clearly and that He humbles you to see that He is great and merciful and all things are possible through Him, may you trust in Him with all of your heart !

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart
    and lean not on your own understanding;
 in all your ways submit to him,
    and he will make your paths straight.”
Proverbs 3:5-6

Remember that God loves you enough to create a way for you to live an abundant life through His Son, Jesus Christ and He has great plans for your life-May you seek Him to discover them!

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